Saturday, March 8, 2008

The world according to Norris

STATS FIASCO
What????? Take Extras out of the Stats??? Extras are how I score most of my runs???????
I'm not sure this "proposed" new STAT is true reflection of a batsman's contribution to the side.
It's possible to turn a wide or no-ball into a -5.
After all, I once smashed a NINE! (FINE!) off a single delivery bowled off the pitch. That was EXACTLY what you do with that little piece of bowling rubbish.
Would this new rule mean I'd only "niggled" or "nerdled" a SEVEN off a full pitched ball wide on the offside, having strode forward picking it up on the half volley at knee height, smacking it over the top of outstretched arms cannoning into the back net, cantering through - not earning the fully deserved credit of NINE for picking up the extra TWO when it was on offer? Has Gladdy gone COMPLETELY
INSANE????? (I'd rather not mention the one or two occasions I've been run out for -5 for what was almost possibly a 7!)

EARLY ENCAMPMENT WHISPERS IN CERTAIN CIRCLES OF THE FOUNDING FATHERS SENIOR LEADERSHIP GROUP
Despite a tradition of Encampment inflictions, Snorkmeister (head bite infection) Choco (lower back dirt bike incident) Our Kylie (lbw calf beach cricket incident) and Hugo (possible broken toe and serious pole dancing strain) are always a potential cameo. Nads and Itchy are chomping at the Encampment Bit and Norris and Gladdy are already working on the first "Unplugged Electrical" version of several new big hits like "Two More Double Ryes!" and "Burn it up and Serve it Cold!" and special new releases like "Stop Running me Out" and "SEVEN to WIN off the FINAL DELIVERY!" (sung by Nads and Itchy to the tune of THUNDERSTRUCK!) (played by Gladdy and Norris - backup vocals - The Founding Fathers) Gilly is already there! Encampment is closer than you think!

SNORKMEISTER RETURN FOR ENCAMPMENT?
Kermie is rumoured to be getting ready (for a good kip) not to mention Norris who needs a good encampment to basically not sleep at all.

SNORKMEISTER RETURN TO THE NETS?
In a cloud of mystery, it is only a matter of time before the Snorkmeister dons the baggy tie dye and smackes twenty runs and takes four for minus three earning yet another man of the match and then proceeds to give the Captains Dressing Down! in the carpark. Kermie is also keen..

SIDE NAMED FOR TUESDAY 11 MARCH - FOUNDING FATHERS 8:
1. Norris - beer boy
2. Kermie - Captain
3. Nads
4. Gladdy
5. Madman
6. Andy
7. Harmie
8, Sometimes Seven are better than Eight.

Gilly - doubtful
Hugo - serious Encampment, match winning bocce toe stubbing incident
Itchy - radio producing, screenplay writing
Choco - planets have to align
Kevin! - he's gotta be able to play a match soon!
Gristle - up for the challenge
Ross - is golf that important?
Freaky - would be handy
Inzy - ankle soreness?
Conga - we gotta get him back!


WHEN IS THE NEXT BYE?
Commoffit. Half the reason we play cricket is to go to the pub and drink a beer and watch the Cricket?
Founding Father Pub night is coming up and could actually involve a bit of frivolity and candour.





Other Links:
Check out this latest story about Canadian Cricket:

CANADIAN CRICKET TEAM LOOKS TO AUSTRALIA FOR HELP!
Canook Observer
It's no surprise that Canadian-born cricketers are smashing away in Australia. One young Canadian-born cricketer in Australia is earning a name for himself not only for his ability to "smash" boundaries but also to "pin" down batsmen and find the edge with good length deliveries. Graceful and effective in the field, this young Canadian/Australian cricketer doesn't waste any time between the wickets either. After top scoring with the bat at the encampment, Norris is tipped to become a highly sought after IPL commodity.

PS
Last week Norris smashed a "-1" and reckons consistency is better than the -28 by his partner. Norris bowled five leg break deliveries that were mostly wides (and chucked!) but also bowled five "dot" balls with medium pace - introduced the wrist action and a couple of em swung! Gilly missed a chance or two. As did everyone. Gilly pointed out that Norris had participated in the Fathers "WORST EVER" partnership. Another STAT that might not make it into the record book. After all, we are talking about Norris - one of the many legends in Founding Fathers Folklore!

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