FFCC Match Aborted Due to Burger Boy Tanty

Dear Santa,

I was really hoping for a few doses of those cool new steroids that Tour de France folks can't detect but after being a naughty boy at the WICC last night I'm afraid all I'll get is a lump of coal for Christmas again this year.

I didn't mean to have a nasty little temper tanty but after Billy the Kid called me Superman and Snorkey bowled that pacey bouncer 3 metres over my head I just couldn't hold it together anymore.

My girlfriend wasn't going so good as umpire and she kept disagreeing with my wide and no ball calls and it really made me feel like how poor Greg Bird must have felt.

Those guys from the FFCC are just so cool and look so good in those tie dyed shirts and we didn't even have matching shirts and my girlfriend gave me -5 and I was really embarrassed.

I was doing ok early on in the match when we held Gilly (15) and Choco (13) to a 28 run partnership. I was making all the right calls behind the stumps and my girlfriend was agreeing with every decision I made and I think the FFCC guys thought I was really cool.

And then when Cheezy (-1) and Gladdy (-7) seemed to stop trying and wouldn't look at me and just ignored all my cool antics behind the stumps I started really getting angry.

Snorky (8) and Norris (3) didn't talk to me either and Norris complained about no one being able to hear my girlfriend but I just didn't understand because it didn't matter because I was making all the right calls.

And then we couldn't get Billy (10) out and Kylie (24) resurrected the match for the FFCC dudes.

I just knew we wouldn't be able to chase down the 66 we needed for victory and so when I came into bat I didn't bother running between the wickets so at least the FFCC guys would think that I am really cool. And I swore a lot and walked across the pitch at the non strikers end when they were bowling just so I would get their attention. And then when Billy called me Superman and Cheezy and Snorkey started to try to take my head off with bouncers I just wanted to go and lay in the corner and cry and cry.

But my girlfriend sent me off after I had a little tanty and I guess I'm not going to get any for a little while. I guess I was a bit mean to my girlfriend because she was crying so much after she sent me off that they decided they shouldn't bother finishing the match.

Tony rang me today and said Norris had given him the low down and that I shouldn't bother coming back to the WICC anymore and the FFCC didn't even have to pay for the match. And now Gilly has a date with my girlfriend on Friday night. Maybe I'll try Netball, I think I'd look good in a skirt.

Ok I'd better get back to flipping burgers at my cool job at the Fyshwick servo.

NEXT WEEK - 8:40pm
1. Billy the Kid
2. Billy the Kid's mate
3. Nads - BEER BOY
4. Norris - CAPTAIN
5. CHOCO - unfinished business
6. Itchy
7. Gladdy
8. Harmie

Let Itchy know if you can't play...