6 JUNE 2007
Four Founding Fathers were indefinitely suspended last night by team management after it surfaced that they had been "moonlighting" in the local Wednesday Night Girl Guides Cookie "Bake Off" competition. Citing a lack of commitment to the Founding Fathers, the statement provided to the press identified Snorkey, Hugo, Itchy and Our Kylie were to be controversially suspended for inadvertently bringing the Founding Fathers Brand into disrepute.
The Girl Guides Association was contacted and described the four disgraced Fathers as four of the most dedicated girls in the group.
After being named in the 8 man squad Hugo, Itchy and Our Kylie all dropped out of the side on game day raising suspicions of extracurricular activities. Snorkey, believed to be the ring leader, may face tough sanctions and be forced to wear his girl guide uniform in future matches.
In an unprecedented display of commitment, Gilly and Norris came off the bench on short notice thus avoiding a Fathers forfeit and outlay of $96.
But the six member Founding Father squad was never able to recover after learning that their cricketing colleagues had turned their backs on them. In a desperate move and possibly lacking judgement after learning of the Girl Guides scandal, Captain Gladdy enlisted two members of the Joe Dacky squad to bolster the ranks.
Now the laughing stock of the B-Grade competition, the Founding Fathers went down by over a hundred runs for the second time in three weeks.
The Founding Fathers executive team held a post match crisis car park conference. It was determined that the Founding Fathers should meet at the Old Canberra Inn for State of Origin beers and feed ahead of the 10:00pm start next week against the hapless Yallops.
In the 8:
1. Big Kev - Captain
2. Gladdy
3. Conga
4. Gilly
5. Norris
6. to be named
7. to be named
8. to be named
Reserves:
Nads -
Choco -
Gristle - Betty Ford
Girl Guides:
Snorkey
Hugo
Itchy
Our Kylie
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